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Dear @RocketRed (Updated)

EDIT: Dear readers, go fuck yourselves you dumbass fucks

Dear @RocketRed,

I have been made aware of a post you published on around three hours ago. This is the link to your post, this is the screenshot:

RocketRed, you are a liar. Now, there are lot of people like you, all mouth and no brains, who think they're brave and wonderful by lying online. However this case is different. In your post, not only are there four clearly demonstrable statements that I can prove without a shadow of a doubt are outright lies, but they include very serious accusations that include criminal activity on my part. What you wrote and published about my person is absolutely false and due to the seriousness I am obliged to clear my name. 

Therefore, you have two choices:

1) You mail to me and/or publish on a full and unreserved apology that states very clearly that you were not telling the truth and now regret your lies and falsehoods. I will give you 24 hours.

2) If not I will begin legal action for defamation of character, specifically to sue you for libel. The action will include a petition of exemplary damages due to the serious nature of your lies. The action will begin by issuing a subpoena to in order to find out your real name and address. From there you will be served. 

As with that other anonymous chatroom pondscum who decided to go way over the top about me and force me into taking legal action to uphold my good name, I am being more than fair by giving you the opportunity to make a full apology. And by the way RocketRed, I know how this system works because over time, several unsavoury characters have tried to sue me for libel. None have succeeded because I told the truth about them. Unlike you, all you managed to get right is my last name you crudball. Prepare to be poor. 

Consider this due warning.

UPDATE: I see you are a brave boy:

Not only are you a liar, but you quite clearly know very little about the law (hint: ignorance of law is not a defence). However, I will stick to my 24 hour offer because unlike you I am a man of honour. But after that and after seeing your mouthful of a reaction I promise you, as long as that apology doesn't show I'm going to take a lot of pleasure in making you poor.

UPDATE 2: Oh wow RocketRed, it would seem you've been spreading your defamation and lies on multiple platforms. You're so cute, and you are going to love the rest of 2017.

UPDATE 3: Renneberg. Too easy. This is going to be even more fun than I imagined.